went to Lollapalooza mostly alone but i wasn’t sad about it

diplo mick

I spent this past weekend covering Lollapalooza and spent a lot of time by myself, since tickets are too expensive for my broke friends, and my tastes are too 2-Chainz-y for my journo friends. So as the oddly alone smoked-out dude, I conducted some highly thoughtful surveying of the crowds. At times conversations were had. It was fine! Here’s some of what I saw and what it was like. It will be exactly like you were there, trust me.

FRIDAY

Smith Westerns – Right off the bat, a conversation I’ve never had before! :: older guy talks to me for like 10 minutes about how he doesn’t like new rap because he “just can’t understand what they’re saying” while the dude continued loving the totally coherent lyrics of rock music. Sometimes I just can’t with people. Smith Westerns sounded good though.

Father John Misty – Have you ever watched Zach Galifiniakis and wished you were watching an underfed, more pretentious version of that guy perform folk music? If you did, you would have loved Father Johh Misty’s set. I know I did.

Crystal Castles – Alice Glass drank Jameson while smoking skaggs, which is about all that matters.

Monsta – These derivative dub-boys’ dumb stage set-up was too dumb-huge for people to be able to hit them with anything.

Disclosure – Shit was like an exorcism with the fits all the people were having when “Fire Starts to Burn” dropped. To be fair though, every bit of this set was totally on-point.

Chance the Rapper – This was my first show of Teenapalooza, during which you experience Lollapalooza surrounded by teens. At Chance the Rapper, there were teens on teens on teens. So many teens: looking for “A” (adderall), throwing beer cans, climbing trees, throwing beer at the kids in the trees. More addy-d out teens chanting FALL FALL FALL at the kids in the trees. The teens in trees soon returned to the ground, but without any A. 😥

Anyway, the show was still pretty great. Chance himself was just recently a teen! The big moment was when he brought out Twista for “Cocoa Butter Kisses,” and these teens didn’t know who Twista was barely even cared! I’m not a fogey tho–you gotta love these whippersnapping teens.

Nine Inch Nails – Idk honestly. I left early. Blasphemous. Call me a 23-year-old teen (mostly because I am).

SATURDAY

kdot

Local Natives – They were a fittingly chill 4pm Saturday set, which I’m pretty sure is a compliment. Mostly I listened to my buddies trading stories about having seen them before and they used words like “chill” and “great,” so I’m pretty sure this was a typically solid set for LN.

Ellie Goulding – Got to hear “Anything Could Happen” and felt like “Anything Could Happen,” so that shit was on point. Plus there were bros dancing with 10 y/o girls dancing with their moms dancing with sorority chicas, which I’m not sure you could see anywhere else.

Kendrick Lamar – I waited an hour and got a really good spot for this one. Some kid asked me if I was “smoking on mids,” and I almost gave him the finger. I did meet these people though, who followed me on Twitter then asked me to tweet this pic of them. I didn’t, but only cause service sucked, I swear.

new friends

Loved this show, mostly bc I love Kendrick. It was a little sentimental–he got emo about being born in Chi and seeing the crowd-surfing wheelchair guy. But he was ready to drop some bangers, and it worked for the most part.

His mic needed to be louder in general, and he needs a better closer than “Drank,” which doesn’t have the energy to close. It’s much better for the middle of the set when you’re at peak levels of wavy.

Mumford and Sons – So many people here. I can barely summon up the energy to hate this second-rate diluted folk basura, because there were bros dancing with 10 y/o girls dancing with their moms dancing with sorority chicas. Felt like I’d been there before.

SUNDAY

wavves lolla

Wavves – The kids around me for this one were like 14. Shit was weird. Lots of moshing though, and nihilist Nathan sounded good.

2 Chainz – “Feds Watchin” was played, making this set a rousing success. I also got the kid next to me so high that he put on his sunglasses and didn’t talk for the rest of the show, so, again, success.

Phoenix – The couple next to me bummed me a couple skaggs and let me tug on their Admiral Nelson, so you know I had a good time. But really, Phoenix has filled out their setlist with so many awesome dancey anthems (“Entertainment” was an incredible opener), it’s objectively impossible to have a bad time at their show. I didn’t.

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